Friday, December 05, 2003

missing appendages

A loyal reader from Desolation, AL writes to ask:
sometimes, if i accidentally scroll too far down, i notice that you have

updated a previous blog. usually, though, i'm sure that i miss your
updates because why would i intentionally scroll down to read a blog entry
that i've already read before? conversely, those who keep up with the
blog less often than i do are far more likely to catch an update because
they will more likely be reading the original blog plus the update at the
same time.

all this leads me to propose the following fundamental problem, which is
this: the devotion of a reader is indirectly proportional to the
likelihood of a reader catching a blog update

how should this problem be remedied? perhaps you could post a new blog
whenever you update an old blog. well, that might get to be a bit taxing.
hmmm. i don't know. what do you think? is this just another one of
those injustices in life that i have to learn to deal with?
i hope not.
i am working under the assumption that your blog is a safe haven, perhaps
the last refuge, for fairness and integrity...

JFW doesn't post updates to that many entries (or at least updates that are appended to the bottom of the post rather than provided as separate posts), but we appreciate the concern of our premium subscribers to keep up with updates that are sometimes posted to weblog entries. Through a secret collaboration with Microsoft, we have developed a solution. If you logged into JFW just now using Internet Explorer, an update to your web browser was surreptitiously installed. To activate this new feature, you only need to press CONTROL + F. Then type "update" in the box. The browser will go automatically scroll down to the next update for you, if one exists. If you do this once every JFW scroll cycle (2 weeks), you will be guaranteed not to miss a word.

Alternatively, if you have a Houndstooth(tm) enabled cellular telephone, we have a new feature that will automatically beep your cel phone whenver a new post (or update to an old post) is made. We will continue to harness every available technological means to give you this best available weblog reading experience.

Update, 7PM: The same reader, although now mysteriously relocated to Effervescence, ME, writes in to say:

that's totally cool! THANKS!

you rock! rock me, amadeus! rock me all night long!

No comments: