Monday, December 29, 2003

b.c.f.

I'm possibly in the market for some new furniture for the RV. I was looking at sofas online while talking to a friend on the phone, and we had this exchange:

Said in a tentative, but hopeful, voice:"What about the Studio Merlot? What do you think of that?"
Reply, as if I had just suggested buying a davenport made out of sculpted feces:"No! Don't get that! That would be so Burlington Coat Factory!!!"

Yikes. Shopping for furniture online was already complicated and nervewracking enough, and now I have to worry that my tastes are going to lead me to buy something that is going to be completely BCF. I've never even been inside a Burlington Coat Factory. I didn't even know they sold furniture. I thought they mainly sold, as quaint as this might sound, coats. I'm wondering if I should go to the BCF on the west side and go in just so I can get a handle on what it is that I should be ruling out.

Update, 9:30: BCF has an online site, including their Christopher Lowell collection. I had never heard of Christopher Lowell until this last trip back to the farm, where it turns out that various members of my family are huge Christopher Lowell fans. They went on about him at some length. "And, he's also really, you know..." "Flamboyant," said my niece. "Froot loops," said another family member. "Froot Loops? " "Froot loops." "You mean, like Froot Loops the cereal or like the toucan that advertises for Froot Loops." "YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN."

Update, 4:30pm next day: A busybody reader from Carson City, NV writes in to protest: "Fruit loops is actually spelled FRUIT, like the things the loops are supposed to taste like." To which I can only respond thusly.

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