Sunday, June 03, 2007

regarding a voicemail left for me yesterday

The voicemail, as best as I can transcribe it:
Hey, Jeremy, this is Ron. I was calling because I saw the news on your blog today that you are now a proud father and Katie is now a proud mother. So, congratulations guys! It's really fantastic. I can imagine that it must be very heady times. Give me a call when you get a chance. I can imagine that you must be pretty busy getting used to a pretty big change in life and lifestyle. I hope all is well. I'll talk to you soon. Bye.
As a rule, I do not discuss matters from my intimate life on this blog. However, for reasons unclear to me, some matters of clarification appear to be in order:
1. I am not married.
2. I have never fathered a child.
3. I have never, as best I can recall, been romantically involved with anyone answering to the name of "Katie."
4. I do not have anyone named "Ron" listed in my phone address book; I am drawing a complete blank on who might be a "Ron" and who would expect me to recognize him from "This is Ron" and have my cell phone number; I do not recognize the voice on my voicemail; my cell phone was off for large parts of yesterday and so I don't have any caller ID for the call.
None of which is to suggest that I don't appreciate the warm sentiments, Ron. I do fear that you might have somehow drawn some incorrect inferences, and that your well wishes might be a bit misdirected. I'm sorry I don't recognize you from your name or voice.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Clearly a wrong number, but weird he had your cell #. Not like you can find that in the white pages if you're looking to track down a friend's contact info.

Anonymous said...

Hi Jeremy. Ron here again. I'll give you a call this evening to explain.

Anonymous said...

...forgot to mention: congrats again to you and Katie!

sara said...

A mystery for the boy detective! I'm excited to hear about its denouement...

jeremy said...

Anon 12:59: Wrong number seems an unlikely hypothesis given that Ron got my first name right and that I have a blog.

Ron: If you are Ron, I'll await your call.

Anonymous said...

If not a wrong number, even weirder...

Absolut said...

For a moment I was concerned you were about to out something about us.

BTW, can you really be that sure about #2?

Anonymous said...

Maybe not a human child. Maybe an alien baby!

Anonymous said...

Could it have something to do with Katie Holmes, or Ron Jeremy?

This sounds like the telephone version of "Hi PERSONAL NAME HERE. I'd like to sell you some Viagra."

Do let us know if he returns the call, and just has you mixed up with Kieran.

Anonymous said...

Anon811:
One healthy intact JF? Wouldn't it be much more fun for all of us out here if he morphs?

Anonymous said...

Why no "best I can recall" for point #2?