Tuesday, December 26, 2006

(ongoing series) ways i am different from my family

872. My lack of enthusiasm for milk.

milk

Photo from Xmas dinner at my sister's. Which place at the table was mine will be left as an exercise for the lactose-lovin' reader.

873. My lack of enthusiasm for scatological humor.*

defecating reindeer

Above is the stocking stuffer given to myself and others by two different immediate family members this holiday. In case it's not clear from the photo, the idea with "The Super Dooper Reindeer Pooper" is that it's a plastic reindeer that you press on its tail and it defecates brown jellybeans. Seriously, there is basically a two-step surefire recipe if you want to make my family double-over with laughter and me squirm uncomfortably: (1) take a joke that would otherwise be maybe funny, maybe not and (2) add poop.

* As always when I use a book for the background of a photo, a coveted JFW virtual kewpie doll will be awarded to the first person to identify it.

5 comments:

Lucy said...

A couple of Christmases ago my aunt, who is a nun, was endlessly delighted by this keyring. She would probably love those reindeer.
Is the number of cavities you've had also a difference between you and your family?

Anonymous said...

Statistics on the Table, Steven Stigler. Harvard U. Press. (Didn't even have to look it up, cementing my rep as a stats geek). Great book.

With respect to my own family, you are giving me some good ideas for presents next year.....

Anonymous said...

Since I share your disaffection for lactose (except for in ice cream...or cheese plates!), I'll say that this is another thing that Judiasm does well -- the prohibition against ingesting milk with meat can greatly reduce the number of meals at which one might be asked to drink a glass of milk.

jeremy said...

Lucy: My family is probably looking for that keyring now on e-Bay.

Dan: Congrats on the kewpie doll!

Anon: Cheese plates rock.

Anonymous said...

I greatly dislike milk. I can drink it if I put lots of vanilla and sugar in it, but the idea of just drinking a plain glass of milk really grosses me out.

Some of my family members gave out very similar pooping things--it was a cow rather than a deer, but equally disturbing. Not, however, as disturbing as last year with the fart machines.

And my cousin got a doll that pees and poops. The poop is green. I cannot see the point of having a doll if you have to change it all the time. Might as well get a real kid.