Wednesday, April 05, 2006

kathryn is annoyed with me because i refuse to name a star after her

I don't care if the "service" has been around since whenever and has whatever alleged star naming authority. I don't believe it. I don't believe that, in the future, space explorers from Earth will be referring to stars by names like "TO KITTEN LOVE RONNIE XOXO" just because someone paid $54 back in the 21st century for permanent naming rights and didn't know enough to turn the caps lock off. And, even if I did, giving stars whatever name somebody chooses just because they are willing to pay $54 seems wrong. Meritocracy should prevail in the naming of the firmament, I say. So, yes, while my generosity toward friends may seem unbounded--a fact about me that, incidentally, goes unnoted in my Wikipedia entry--sometimes I just have to say a principled no.


Anonymous said...

This really says a lot about our relationship! After everything that we've been through together in the NINE years we've been friends (including and especially the drive from Bloomington to Madison during the worst blizzard I've ever seen in which we both nearly LOST OUR LIVES), I don't think getting scammed out of $54 to achieve one of my life's goals is too much to ask. But I guess you do. I will have a star named after me someday. Even without your help!

brady said...

But what if the star was named:

"Hey Ellen
Mark says hi
Tom what else can I say
I love you very much
I'm glad we're together
miss you a lot
Love Kitten
oh yeah oh yeah"

That would be cool.

jeremy said...

Brady: There is a limit of 35 characters on star names.

Kathryn: I'll deal with your vitriol later.

Mike Shanahan said...

The wikpedia entry is cool. I wonder if the same person wrote the entry for Manson, IA?

Rhymes With Scrabble said...

And I bet that even within the 35 characters, they don't allow line breaks. That's the Man for you.

shakha said...

Something that doesn't elicit "a principled no": shameless self-promotion.

brady said...

Yeah, well, uh, there's a limit on how much beer a reasonable person would drink before playing live on national television, but that never stopped the Replacements.

Sure, maybe it should have. . .