as if

As if I am going to post anything today. I am working on the departmental lecture that I am giving tomorrow. Its title was developed over the course of an acceleratingly maniacal series of e-mails with the person assigned the responsibility of getting me to cough up a title after I kept putting it off. As a result, I've violated one of the fundamental rules of academic titles, which is that it is acceptable to be cutesy either before or after the colon, but never both. (The part before the colon is a pun on one of the more influential books to come out of Wisconsin sociology, Opportunity and Change.)